On our way back from school, I was talking with my son on how's going today in his routine life at the school.
"Eh, alright." said he.
Then silence.
This is the answer I usually get, expected, standardised, like the ones given to thousands other parents.
"Dad, you know what. The pressure is really mounting and everyone has that smirky smile when I walk by my friends."
"I know. But you have done all you can and simply play waiting game now. It should be alright." I comforted him.
If you have a senior in high school, you know what I'm talking about. It's all about college!
By now, thousands of seniors who have sent out their EAs will have to wait for two more weeks. Their fate of their first college admission will be notified by an email from their chosen college in the middle of December: admitted, rejected or deferred.
This year, it's especially chaotic due to Harvard and Princeton announcement on drooping their EA programs last year and it takes effect now.
"Dad, what if I got all rejected by the colleges I apply?" He broke the silence.
Usually a student will applied for multiple colleges and make their final decision before next May.
"Nonsense, at least I know you have verbally offered a full-ride for a good one. You'll have to be patient." I fully understood his current state of anxiety and pointed out one of options.
"I know, I know, but simply cannot resist these thoughts in my mind". He murmured.
"Cheer up! Let's get back and play a game. If you win, dinner on me at your choice." This is the best I could offer.
"Are you sure? Deal!" He finally showed his real and bright smile and he knew that he would go to his favorite restaurant tonight since I had not been able to beat him about two years ago.
- posted on 12/01/2007
How come I sense more stress for "I"?
Next time, when this is up, tell him about the presure the Chinese or Koeran Senior students have when they are facign the addmision exam......
On the other hand, it is all about expectation management......
And of course, it is easier to say when one is not on the same boat as you and your son.
A daughter of our friend, from top high school, top rank in her class, everyone around her from the family, friends of parents, expected she would go to Harvard, the result: not a single ivy league gave her the green lights, she landed at NYU. She would have a better landing if there were not that much expectation.
Another friend's daughter, Hunter High in NYC, they never expected her to go to this or that school, she got into Harvard, double major for Math & Physics. Her best friend vowed to go to Harvard and become an educator, elementary school principal. She spent high school summer at South America and Africa, volunteering in educational related program. However she was so upset that she did not get Harvard, even though she got Yale.
.....
Good luck.
- Re: That smirky smile...posted on 12/01/2007
sz wrote:
"Are you sure? Deal!"
Oh come on, a treat at a nice restaurant is not fatal. :-)
(okay I screwed up; I was reading "dead", somehow. Must got that from the writing style).
To the parents:
If you want to go to Harvard, do so yourself. Do not burden your child with that unfulfilled dream of YOURS.
- Re: That smirky smile...posted on 12/01/2007
Consider going to top schools as one of life's games. Play well if you can. But life is more than all the games. It can get really creepy when all that is to life is being in the rat race. - Re: That smirky smile...posted on 12/01/2007
Anxiety is natural during this period of time for senior families and it doesn't matter which schools one applies. Not everyone can go to HYP. The key is to be natural and enjoy every moment of it. - Re: That smirky smile...posted on 12/01/2007
草庵居士换ID了?几年前看过他写的一些东西,后来他就销声匿迹了(还是我懒得找).
阿姗 wrote:
看到你们的讨论,忍不住想起前几天看到的草庵居士写的儿子升学的事。以前还真不知道草庵居士是谁。一查,咖啡里已经批判过了。
- Re: That smirky smile...posted on 12/02/2007
Thank you for your good wishes, rzp and Ashan.
One has to know where one stands. Statistically one will land to one of the schools among one's reach and safty schools. I have stopped thinking about which school my s should go about a year ago since he's been totally in charge of it and I know what his interest is and which schools he would like to go.
Going to a school is only part of one's formal education process. One's drive and passion are probably much more important...
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